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| Robin Rocky Mountain Stroke Survivor |
I know I’m not the only one who suffers with this since my strokes, though it’s not something I ever expected or anyone involved in my care has ever asked about. It’s gradually gotten better as I’ve recovered and as I’ve learned to manage it, but if I go beyond my limits or am fatigued, it’s completely unmanageable. I’ll bet I’m not the only one to yell, “Shut up!” apparently out of the blue. The people with me don’t realize that the curtain is swaying in the breeze, the dishwasher is whirring, there is a bird outside, and that voice, that voice is talking so fast and high and I can’t take it anymore!!!!
I usually don’t attend church (largely for the above reasons but also for others that I’ll discuss another time) but today I had to be there at the beginning to stand beside a woman making an announcement (I still actively volunteer). No one sat still in their seats; they leaned to talk to each other, swayed, wiggled. The pre-service chatter ebbed and flowed. Then the music started. Everything seems a little too loud when I’m overstimulated so this was REALLY LOUD. The background on the lyrics for the music was moving, which to me was positively psychedelic. The person behind me kept bumping into my chair. The music was your typical “contemporary service” music with a heavy drum beat and people kept doing horrible things like waving their arms and bobbing their heads. I was a wreck by the time I left, about ten minutes in to the service.
I’ve learned to monitor how much sensory input I’m getting and if I start getting that irritated, anxious, about to scream feeling, I pay close attention. Would turning off the fan help? Or turning off the radio? Dimming the lights? Walking into another room? I’ve also explained the problem to everyone close to me so they understand. But I know it sounds crazy and is hard to really, truly understand.
And then I found this video…it does an amazing job! I had to look away during several parts because it made me more dizzy than I am already but it is so close to how the world actually looks…throbbing, spinning, and loud.
Do you struggle with sensory overload? How do you cope?
Standard YouTube License @ National Autistic Society
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