September 19 / 2015
Unlike most of my blog posts, this one is part rant and part brag. Sit tight, though – you’ll see (I’m hopeful I’ll show you) how they are related.
Long before having a stroke, I refused to listen to unsolicited advice. If I ask for advice, I’ll pay attention, but volunteer your opinion about what I’m doing, and I shut down. It’s not that I’m not open-minded, just that I spent a long time in my life trying to please everyone, and then I decided to stop. I think it was when I became a mother and I decided to parent my way despite all the voices of experience inundating me with the same shit I just wasn’t paying attention to the first time the person offered it.
Then I had a stroke; at that point, I asked many people for advice and took what little was offered to try to fit into my new circumstances. Again, though, I received appalling unsolicited advice.
One survivor hassled me via FaceBook to try Neuro-Aid – because it worked for her and would “definitely” work for me. Actually, she told me to ask my herbalist to concoct the equivalent for me using all-natural ingredients; and if I didn’t happen to have an herbalist, she could put me in touch with hers, who she was sure would be happy to provide me with it. Yes, I finally un-“friended” her.
I believe that stroke survivors who are actively working on recovery research their options, try them out, then select the ones they find work for them (or make them feel better in some way). We also set specific and concrete goals, sometimes with deadlines, sometimes without.